Now is not the time...

So it's been a while....

I thought it might make interesting reading to have me track my Whole30 experience. But it's been about as interesting as watching hair grow. Don't get me wrong - it hasn't been too tough.  I am sticking to it - no problem at all.  I feel very healthy, no tummy troubles to report. And I did get over my eternally grumpy phase and into the 'EVERYTHING IS SO SHINY! OMG - THAT'S A FRICKING UNICORN!!!!' phase.... for one day.  

And on that one day I did a crazy Crossfit workout with energy to spare.  I felt invincible! There was a spring in my step, the world was my oyster blah-di-blah.  I went to school-for-monkeys that night thinking 'you know what, I am going to do the hell out of all our practical work in the gym'. And so I did.  After completing 120 backsquats with a 30kg load earlier in the day (plus around 40 half-arsed handstand push-ups and 2kms of rowing in under 9 minutes), I completed another 50 or so reps on the lat pull-down, a few dozen bicep curls, some planks, 50 or so chin-ups and general mucking about with vigour for 2 hours, followed by 250 box jumps.  My partner in the box jumps was recovering from viral bronchitis.  We both exercised to complete exhaustion.  

I came home feeling pretty wrecked.  Went to bed with a headache (dehydrated maybe!?!?!) and woke the next day feeling rough.  The following morning I could barely move.  My chest felt like a Japanese contemplation garden with all the freakin' raking across my lungs....  Needing to be a tough little mother and get through the day with the evil toddlers, I dosed up on cold and flu medicine so I could 'Solider On'.  The following morning I felt worse.  I decided to fill in an old repeat prescription for antibiotics because I 'don't have time to be sick' - certainly no time to wait in a doctors waiting room to be told to go on antibiotics.  I went to work the following day to hack up a lung, to school the next day so I could hack up the other and then finally crashed on Sunday, just before my little boy came down with the same or a similar bug....  

My first thought was 'Great! Now I'm going to be up all night with a sick toddler and I won't be able to go to training. AGAIN.'  But as I watched him fall in and out of sleep (he hasn't had an afternoon nap in almost a year), burning hot, cuddled in my arms, I just melted into my role of nurturer and comforter.  I remembered my real priorities and decided that exercise could wait for now.

I also realised that THIS is how we are supposed to get over a virus.  We are SUPPOSED to feel like a truck has hit us, to expel mucus, to burn a fever, sweat, dribble, ache etc.  Until our body naturally defeats the bug.  The fact that I went for the drugs and struggled to 'push through it' and didn't ask Hot Husband to stay home for a day and help me out was actually about as dumb as eating a box of donuts with a bottle of bourbon on the side (hey - that used to be a healthy snack for me).    

Being healthy is about whole lifestyle - not just what we eat or how hard we work out at the gym.  It's about getting downtime when you need it (not when it's scheduled), it's about dropping expectations sometimes and allowing the natural rhythm of our bodies or our lives to dictate our activity.  

Recently a very strong and fit Australian woman named Denae Brown qualified to go to to LA and compete as an individual in the World Crossfit Games.  She had to withdraw at the last minute because she found out she was pregnant.  I thought to myself 'oh no, she must be devastated that she did all that hard work and didn't get to use it!' but she is absolutely thrilled. She's going to have a  baby.  You forget how exciting that is (she may not be as thrilled when she finds out how much sleep you get in the first three years!). If she can deal with that sort of setback and be over-the-moon then I am sure I can miss a week of my own half-arsed training.  Besides, I have been eating really well and resting my sorry muscles and bones so it's not all that bad.

This last week has been a good lesson for me. I like to think I can control and conquer anything with the right amount of planning and persistence.  But nature can't be tamed. Sometimes it's better to learn to ride the wave instead of getting dumped and eventually drowned by the beast.  

I also learnt that bacon makes everything better.

Fifty Filthy Pinkie Pies

So I am thinking that they should name Saturdays at my affiliate 'The WTF Show'....

Today was 'filthy fifty'... it was akin to having the skin peeled off your face and gently placed back there with love and kindness but with a hint of smirky cruelty.  I am not going to bother listing the details - have a look here. I did NOT do it Rx today - I would have faceplanted in spectacular fashion.

So I was going to report about how Whole30 is going - MWAH! I just saw this picture of Donatella Versace and it FRIGHTENED me!

Anyway.... carry on....

Yes - so I am on Day 6 of Whole30 and I have purposefully not written about the day-to-day feelings and bla bla because I knew it was going to get a little funky. And sure enough it did.

In summary: Yes you can do this. No it's not impossible - nothing is impossible if you have cocaine and willpower (cocaine is paleo). But FARKING HELL we have set ourselves up to be an unhealthy species people!!

I've been reading It Starts With Food and I am now fairly certain that grains, dairy and seed oils are messing up our bodies - I know they certainly have messed me up for years - but I just can't see an exit from this insanity on a global/big picture scale?

I went to my favourite BBQ place for a quick meal on Thursday - I was thinking BBQ wings with a salad, hold the feta.  WELL there is sugar in almost EVERYTHING they serve (sauces, rubs, fries, you name it!).  The salad dressings are made from seed (sunflower) oil.... So I settled on wings without sauce.  A night of stomach cramping had me baffled until I realised that they had also coated the wings in flour...

Why do we need to coat chicken in flour?? Why do we consume so much sugar? How the hell do we get the rest of the world over the line on this??

I guess all you can do is lead by example.  I can tell you that on Day 4/5 I was mad as hell over this issue of not being able to escape crap food while socialising.  I also got particularly tired the last 24 hours but my energy levels have otherwise been generally stable.  My moods are more stable aside from this blog rant (hahaha), my appetite has decreased and switched towards more fresh vegetables, smaller portions and healthier choices on balance.  I don't miss flour. I don't miss sugar. I don't miss dairy.  I did have a dream that a violet crumble bar birthed itself from my belly but that's completely normal, m'kay??

My experiences seem to be on par with what others experience on Whole30 so I'm tracking okay from what I can tell.


Meanwhile, Maddy now has an American accent because she got a My Little Pony called PINKIE PIE who says 'i lurve you mooommmmieeeee'.  I had something similar at her age. Poor kid - if she's following in my footsteps she has a lot of alcohol to consume between ages 14-24. What a burden.